Unlock Your French: Real Advice from a French Tutor Who Gets It

Ever felt like French is a beautiful mess?

You’re not imagining it. I’m a French tutor—one who actually listens to learners—and if you’ve ever thought, “I just don’t get it,” you’re in good company.

Between fear, the weird spelling, or native speakers flipping to English before you finish your sentence, there’s a lot going on. Let’s talk about what really holds people back from learning French, and how to start moving past it.

Fear: The Unofficial First Step in Every French Class

This is the big one. Students come in knowing vocabulary, having read the grammar books, and still—nothing comes out when it’s time to speak. It’s not because they don’t know it. It’s fear. Fear of sounding ridiculous, fear of the dreaded blank stare, fear of not being understood. And it’s normal. In fact, it’s so normal that if you didn’t feel it at some point, I’d be surprised.

You don’t need to eliminate fear to start speaking—you just need to start anyway. The only way out is through. Say the wrong thing. Say it twice. And watch it slowly stop feeling terrifying.

Perfectionism: A Language Killer in Disguise

You might think perfectionism is helpful: you want to get it right, after all. But the pursuit of flawless French often backfires. Instead of trying, you end up hesitating. Instead of speaking, you freeze, worried that the sentence you’re about to say is grammatically questionable.

Here’s something perfectionists hate to hear: French people make mistakes all the time. Language isn’t a museum. It’s messy, alive, and full of shortcuts, filler words, and “um”s. If you wait until you feel 100% correct, you’ll be waiting forever. French is learned in the trying, not in the waiting.

Comparison: The Fast Track to Feeling Like You’re Failing

Everyone has That Friend. The one who started French six months ago and now listens to podcasts and casually throws out “subjonctif” in conversation. Meanwhile, you’re stuck remembering the word for cheese.

But here’s the truth: you don’t know how they got there. Maybe they already speak Spanish. Maybe they practice four hours a day. Maybe they’re bluffing. Your job is not to keep up with anyone else. Your job is to build something real for yourself, even if it’s slow.

The Pronunciation Trap: When What You See Isn’t What You Say

French and English do not play by the same rules. You’ve got silent letters all over the place. You’ve got words that look similar to English but sound nothing like what you expect. The “x” in “deux” isn’t pronounced. The “ent” in “parlent” disappears. Even when you do pronounce something, a liaison might sneak in and change the whole flow.

That disconnect between the written and spoken language throws a lot of learners. If you’ve ever looked at a sentence and thought, “Wait, I thought I knew this,” you’re not wrong—French often doesn’t look like what it sounds like. That’s not your fault.

The fix? Less reading in your head, more listening out loud. Let your ear lead your eye. Trust your mouth more than your memory. Slowly, the patterns start to reveal themselves.

The English Reply: Why French People Flip Languages On You

It happens. You open your mouth to say something—something you’ve practiced—and before you even finish, the person responds in English. It feels like a slap. You start wondering if your accent was that bad.

Here’s what’s really happening: most French people want to be helpful. If they hear your accent and speak some English, they think they’re doing you a favor. It’s not rejection. It’s habit. The fix? Keep going in French. Most people will switch back when they see you’re committed.

You Don’t Need More Time—You Need Better Tricks (and a French tutor)

One of the biggest myths? That you need hours a day to improve. In reality, tiny moments make a huge difference. Reading out loud while you make coffee. Thinking in French on your walk to work. Listening to a song on repeat until you understand the chorus. Learning doesn’t only happen in a classroom or during “study time.”

Real progress comes from consistency, not intensity. It’s about finding ways to nudge the language into your life a few minutes at a time. A French class can help guide you, sure—but your daily habits are where the magic sticks.

Final Thoughts from Someone Who’s Seen It All

I’ve worked with a lot of learners. Every age. Every background. And nearly all of them thought they were “bad at languages” at some point. They weren’t. They were just blocked—by fear, by perfectionism, by confusion over pronunciation, by the strange way the written and spoken language don’t match.

If that’s you, you’re not failing. You’re learning. The chaos is part of the deal. If you can learn to laugh at it, you’re already halfway there.